One year

I know you guys all want to see pictures and videos, and I really will try to be better at putting them up more often. But right now there is something else on my mind.

In three days Eliana is scheduled to have surgery. I'm not going to go into all the details up here but basically she is having abdominal surgery that will involve a 5-10 day hospital stay. This is not unexpected, it is something we have known was coming her whole life. But now that it's actually here, it's much harder. I can't begin to describe how awful it is for a mother to think about her baby going in to surgery. I hate the thought of her being in pain, of her not understanding what is going on and of her having to deal with recovery.

There is another issue at hand that also makes this difficult. Leaving Bracha in the hospital the day Eliana and I came home after their birth was one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life. It kills me that there were a couple of days that, while recovering from a c-section in my fourth-floor walk-up while taking care of one newborn, I didn't even make it to the hospital to visit my other baby. I know what it is like to have one twin at home and the other in the hospital. That makes this both easier, having already been through it, and harder, knowing how awful it is.

At least this time one of us will be with Eli 24/7, instead of having to leave her at night like we did with Bracha when she was in the NICU (they didn't have facilities for parents to stay). Bracha plus whichever one of us isn't at the hospital/at work will be with my parents at their home, so she'll be getting plenty of attention. But I'm worried about them missing each other (because for those of you who asked, they are definitely aware of each other. They play together all the time and seek one another out to play). Being apart will not be easy for them, either.

I look forward to the surgery to be over, for her wounds to be healed, and to finally be able to put this whole thing, that has been hanging over our heads all year, behind us.

Please keep our daughter in your thoughts and/or prayers on Thursday, and we'll give you updates as we can.